Editorial: Domestic Violence

You are not alone.

If there is anything we want to get out there – at any time, but especially during October’s Domestic Violence Awareness Month – it is that, no matter who you are or who your abuser is, there is a sea of people out there waiting to help you.

This month, we will wear purple; we will pray; we will hope; we will remember stories we should never have to know; we will think about a world without abuse and fear. We will stand, and we will say: Let us not forget about domestic violence and the people it hurts. Let us not forget to look for the warning signs of abuse among those we love. Let us not forget to reach out our hands to those who may be suffering.

But let us also remember that while there are so many reminders during October that we must continue to work for a world where there are no deaths, no injuries, the violence continues during the rest of the year. And, until we live in a world where we no longer have to remember friends and family who have died, who have been hurt, because of domestic violence, we must continue to do everything we can to create such a place.

The number of domestic violence homicides has decreased in the last year. So, it seems as though this work we have been doing – trying to destigmatize domestic violence, putting resources into shelters and other services for victims, making sure the court system properly deals with abusers – has, step by step, been working.

But, the numbers remain sobering. About 58 percent of all female homicide victims aged 16 years and older were killed by an intimate partner. One in four women will experience domestic violence during her lifetime. Every year, more than three million children in the United States witness domestic violence in their homes.

And these are not just statistics. These are lives. These are people you know. People you go to church or synagogue with. They are mothers and cousins and daughters and sons. They are all ages, and they all have a story that should not be a secret. Most domestic violence incidents are never reported – we must try to change that.

We have included in this week’s paper signs of abuse to look out for – as well as resources for anyone who is hurting.

And, for those who are suffering, know we are here. We – your friends, your family, a woman a call away on a hotline, another woman at a shelter – are all here for you.

There are many resources out there for anyone being abused, but here are a couple more starting places:

The New York City Domestic Violence Hotline: (800) 621-HOPE (4673).

The Queens Domestic Violence Law and Advocacy Project: (718) 657-0424.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline: (800) 799-SAFE (7233).

The New York State Coalition Against Domestic Violence: (800) 942-6906.

There they are, waiting for you. We all are – and we won’t leave until we can all say, once and for all: We are safe. There is no one here who will hurt you.

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