As the publisher of The Forum for the last two decades, I have faced many circumstances, both routine and extraordinary. I have seen things that have inspired joy, anger, sorrow –as well as every other emotion known to humankind.
I have witnessed accidents, celebrated with local sports championship teams, seen the birth of babies and witnessed the devastation of families displaced by fire. I have interviewed heroes and murderers, elected officials, celebrities, students, teachers, lawyers, doctors, writers, dancers, painters, civic activists, community and religious leaders and people from just about every profession on earth.
While doing a job that I cherish every day, I have been exposed to so many things and so many people that the wealth of my experience at times becomes overwhelming. I have published more than 1,000 issues in my career and within each of them, I can honestly say there is at least one memory that stands out.
Some of those memories are linked to people, making them that much more remarkable. I have a particular memory in mind, from about five years ago when I first interviewed Howard Beach resident Mary Napolitano.
In her late thirties, Mary was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. About a year after that diagnosis, I had been asked to interview her about her struggle with the disease and how she planned an alternative medical course of action to fight it. But in sitting with the mother of three, the discussion focused on anything but her cancer.
Instead, Mary spoke about her children and her husband how much she loved her job at Gold’s Gym as a personal trainer. How she cherished her volunteer work as a board member of Angel’s on the Bay and how she intended to keep living life as though cancer was a moveable obstacle. She had things to do.
I remember walking out of that interview, tears streaming down my face. My recollection of that day is still vivid. I was not crying out of sadness; I was in awe. I had just left a woman with a deadly cancer who spent the last hour making ME feel better about things. I got in the car and knew I would see Mary Napolitano again.
And over the years, I did. Many times.
It was always the same as it was in the beginning. There were no discouraging words. Mary always wanted to know how you were. And she always wanted you to know how very much she appreciated every second of everyone’s concern for her and for her family. I got used to walking away from seeing Mary and still being in awe.
I saw her for the last time a couple of months ago.
The news of her passing was very sad. I was sorry that I would never see this woman again; hard to imagine.
In St. Helen’s Church at her funeral mass last week, I realized why I had been in awe of Mary since meeting her. It all became obvious as Mary’s daughters spoke about their mother to the hundreds of friends and family members who packed the church.
“Mom, I want you to know how much of an impact you made on every life you have come across,” said daughter Dawnmarie. “We will forever live our lives in your amazing honor and try our hardest to make you proud.”
Mary Napolitano was an individual who demonstrated strength and courage of virtually impossible proportions. From the minute she learned about her disease, she waged a war of fortitude that has no measure.
At Saturday’s HB Relay, Mary was remembered as what she clearly is, a survivor. Mary Napolitano did not pass on, she passed through.
She led her own personal relay for life by passing her wonderful spirit and soul on to her children.
In honor of that spirit which so selflessly served family, friends and community, The Forum would like to honor Mary Napolitano each and every year at the Howard Beach Relay for Life by presenting the Mary Napolitano Spirit Award, in the amount of $2,500, to a student whose life has been impacted by cancer and demonstrates financial need as a result.
